I returned to my muchly loved islands last night, pretty much exactly 3 months from when I got to Cheyenne, WY. even though it was dark when we drove down thru the keys last night, I couldn’t help but sporadically taking a deep breath, followed by sighing as I said, “…I sure love it here.” I probably did it at least 4 or 5 times. :)
I just don’t know that it’s where God wants me right now. I want it. but His ways and His plans are so much bigger than I can imagine and I so often settle for what my small mind can wrap around.
interning with Continuous Worship Ministries has been incredible and one of those things that I still can’t believe I’m getting to do. and even with this internship, I’m realizing more and more how small my view of what I think God wants to do can be sometimes.
and so this is a re-cap of my internship thus far. I’ve blogged about a lot of the stuff over the past few months, so this will be more of my thoughts on the internship as a whole.
I started off by just committing to intern for the month of July this summer…because, in my small mindedness, I figured God couldn’t possibly be asking me to surrender my comfort in the Keys to pursue something bigger that He had planned. ;) 1 month wasn’t scary to commit to. so at the end of June, I flew out West.
have you ever interned under Paul Braddy? no. you haven’t. I know because I’m the first to intern under him with Continuous Worship. :) BAM! well let me tell you something about Paul. he likes to push people out of their comfort zones. and funny enough, Cristine (his wife, my cousin!!) likes to too. I didn’t realize this going into the internship. which is a good thing. ha :) that first week we did the worship at a family camp out at Maranatha and the very first session, Paul asked me to lead a song (I think it was Mighty to Save…I’m pretty sure). so what did I do? I went and threw up in the bathroom right before the session started. hahaha true story. I don’t think I ever told Paul & Cristine that..but I’m pretty sure they’re going to know now… hahaha um hi guys. :)
even during just that 1 month of interning, I got so many different experiences. leading a song. playing keys. running the slides (I got a miserable cold that 1st week…nice timing). songwriting. practicing guitar and keys. I got to play pads for the 1st time in my life. learning the sound board. Paul & Cristine were also the speakers at the jr high camp we did that month and I got to sit in with them as they developed the theme and messages they were going to bring. we drank a lot of coffee (hey french press, how you doin’?). we laughed a ton. and we talked a lot.
that’s another thing you should know about Paul & Cristine. they’re super intentional. I loved that right away, Paul gave me a couple things to read/listen to on worship and then we’d talk about what I was learning/thinking. the first book I read was “Facedown” by Matt Redman. amazing. personally, I can’t think of a better book to start off this type of internship with.
anyway, needless to say, God really worked on my heart during that month and by the end, I decided this was what I felt God was asking me to continue doing for now. so I flew home, worked a couple weeks, packed up my place, simplified my belongings to what could fit in my Scion XB, and drove out to the great, freakin’ windy & cold & desolate state of Wyoming (still working on loving WY…can you tell?). :) Cristine even flew down to help me drive back! she’s pretty much amazing and now one of my favorite people to road trip with!
I keep wanting to give a play by play of the whole last 3 months but I have to keep reminding myself I’ve already blogged about the details of most of the things. stay general, jen. stay general. overview of internship. stay on track…
one thing that has blown me away during this internship is how much Paul & Cristine have come along side me and walked with me thru the good, bad, and the ugly. like…I think they might genuinely love me and care about me… which is hard for me to believe/receive sometimes. but I think maybe they really do because if they didn’t, I would imagine they would’ve kicked me out a long time ago and said “adios” because I’m not always the easiest to work with. (imagine me with a really big smile…HERE)
we laugh a lot. and Paul is like a master at throwing “your mom” remarks in at just the right moments (which, when their kids are around, totally confuses them and makes it even more hilarious). we drink a lot of coffee and eat a lot of popcorn and mexican food. but we also talk a lot, too, about worship and life and what a life of worship is supposed to look like. we talk about our own struggles and take time to pray together. another thing I totally wasn’t expecting but am truly thankful for is that Paul & Cristine aren’t afraid to confront me when they see things in my life that I usually am not aware of (or am aware of and just choose not to work on). we’ve had some tough conversations, but, like I said in a previous post, it is so evident that they are doing it in love and God has used them in huge ways in my life to gently give me a kick in the rear when I need it. :)
Paul is like the coolest person to intern under. I’ve gotten so many experiences and opportunities to serve, to grow, and to learn. I’ve gotten to join with him and Cristine and various other people to serve thru leading worship in different ways. camps, conferences, seminars, retreats, and churches. I’ve really loved that these last 3 months, we’ve also partnered with a brand new church plant in Torrington and have been helping develop a worship team. this has been amazing for me to get to experience because it’s literally starting from scratch and building a team of lead worshippers. I love the community that has come from these times of spending time together as a team, having a meal together, studying the Word together, and then rehearsing together.
alright once again, I’ve written a book. oops.
dude. so in awe of how big God is and yet how intimately involved He is in each of our lives. His plans are so much bigger than we could imagine. I’m getting just a tiny taste of that.
No comments:
Post a Comment